Tonight, Phoenix floats in and out, audible, then inaudible.
The thoughts are consuming and have been so for weeks, now.
They are louder than the lungs of these Frenchmen.
Though, they can't help but cease momentarily
in concurrence with and reverence to
the notion of alphabetical existence.
Alphabetical.
Alphabet.
Letters.
Here are some of those.
To the one who judged me:
You took your position as such from the day of our meeting. This defendant continuously pled her case for the duration, hoping to sway you for a "not guilty" ruling. But, your verdicts no longer determine my sentencing and weigh heavy upon my shoulders and thoughts. I will never again have to sit through another lecture as my eardrums suffer yet another inundation of self-righteousness and pride. Perhaps it is time you turn the gavel upon yourself? I feel as though your eyes only saw me as another in need of your pearls of wisdom, but I never was and never did. Diatribe after diatribe, my tongue began to atrophy from lack of usage, and when it was, I spoke in parables and of casting stones (but, to no avail). You were born with cotton-stuffed ears. I am content to be freed from the chains of your constant disapproval and watchful eyes.
To the fledgling:
Don't you dare look back. If you do, I avow you face the same fate as the wife of Lot and will be instantaneously turned to a pillar of salt. These hearts are hard and gazes cold; it is due time you experienced the warmth. Run from here with the speed of an Olympic athlete. Dance on the sands. Fly.
To the one who loves me:
I will always love you, too. You are the love of my life.
To the spiral:
Reverse your direction. Head north, fair one. If you continue downwards, though, I shan't leave your side. I have become numbed to being sucked into the vortex created long ago, and have gone from spiral to plane throughout the years. Constancy and stability and ears and shoulders and arms are all I can offer, and are rare, generous gifts. It is scarce that one human being will genuinely offer that to another, as most prefer to keep their ears and shoulders and arms selfishly to themselves. But, mine have been donated to your cause. If only you could see with my eyes and see the light and the beauty radiating from your skin and your soul, shooting off in all directions, refracting. To you, I avow: I am good, I am honest, I am true and of the purest of intent.
5 comments:
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